I never thought myself to be a gambler, until I almost lost someone I hold very dear. Gamblers thrive on risk if it can bring reward, stopping at nothing to win the prize through luck. I thought the idea of winning or losing money was childish and dangerous. Only now I realize…
One doesn’t have to use money to gamble.
Me? I gamble with my time, my effort, and disturbingly my life. And I gambled most of it away on people. Sometimes it payed off. Gaining me recognition and love as lasting as a bubble. When the bubble burst I would be quick to throw all my weight into the next gambit. Like all gamblers, I usually lost big. The house always wins…
So I learnt to cheat circumstances.
I became an acute observer and an excellent magician. I could see the way people operate and do exactly what would win me my next big prize. I became so good that on my darkest day, I made someone fall in love with me. I engineered it, made her feelings my creation. Not to get it wrong, both her and my love was real. But no man should play God like that, because it blew up in my face leaving a nasty scar. Irony is that I knew all along it would end that way… But I gambled on the off chance that I could win.
Today I stopped myself from making a huge mistake.
Yet again I saw a new chance to gamble. But this time I realize what I would be putting on the line… My heart, and the heart of someone else. And I couldn’t take that risk. I wanted to lose my moon while grabbing at stars.
You see, I always expected too much. I wanted perfect when perfect does not exist. And I almost lost everything because of that. So today I break the pattern, today I stand up from the table taking my chips with me. The joke was that all I have fell right into my hands, it was never mine to win.
Avoid make my mistake, when you have to gamble with your time or energy, it probably is not meant to be. Wait, and be patient, and you will be given what you chased all along.